Copy of a briefing from the Euorpean Environmental Agency to the US
EPA. Finally, plants have their say.
Bob Wise
*****************************
THIS IS AN INTERNATIONAL UPDATE ON HOW POLITICS HERE AFFECTS
EVERYTHING, INCLUDING THE WEATHER!!
We're touch and go with spring over here. Only rained a bit yesterday
morning, enough to trick the plants into continuing their blooming.
Then the sun attacked again at about 1400. The plants are getting upset
and the headlines in the paper this morning indicate that if things
don't go to the plants liking, the Student's, Farmer's and Fishermen's
strikes and demonstrations will have to be rescheduled to allow the
plants to demonstrate in front of parliament in a wildcat strike within
the next two days. A European Union resolution has been issued to
require the sun to appear before the Court of Justice to explain it's
outlaw behavior. There is some consideration to pulling the clouds into
the hearing as well, because the plants are saying that the clouds and
the sun are in this thing together and have teamed up against them.
The animal activists are signaling grave concern, because of the
impact on the poor animals if the plants go on strike, i.e, no shade ,
no food, etc. The European Integrated Evaluators of Isolated Ozone
(EI-EI-O) are sounding alarm because of the possible oxygen depletion
and the pending rise in the level of carbon monoxide, due to all the
vehicle traffic, and are calling for drastic measures to restrict the
use of automobiles and trucks. The gasoline companies are threatening
to torch the EI-EI-O unless they back off, expecting a significant
decrease in sales. The environmentalists are going crazy here
literally, and are in the woods everywhere, down on their knees
communing with the plants, trying to work this out at the lowest
level.
Things are fairly normal here on environmental issues, so I don't think
I will need the tailored briefing to the EPA, and the
"regular-one-size-fits-all" would be more appropriate for my needs. I
prefer by E-mail, however, since sending more paper into the country
right at this moment could upset the ecological balance just negotiated
between the environmentalist group, Conserving Nature Significantly
(CNS), and the tree representative organization, All Trees Mature
(ATM).
The newspaper Le Soir carried the following huge headline this morning
on the agreement, "Environmentalists and Trees Agree. CNS/ATM
Agreement Will Have International Impact!" The story goes on to
describe the agreement whereby only the most aging trees will be taken
out of service and then only when their life extension programs,
certified by the Joint Arbre Authorities (JAA) have revealed that the
tree can no longer perform its intended function,and how this will be
communicated to the tree. This has to be done by inspectors from the
Aging Forest Selection Service (AFS). All these types of trees will
then be navigated over random paths or trails to the edges of the
woods for arrival at special collection points called Arbre
Intermediate Resting Point Of Removed Trees (AIRPORTs) under close
surveillance, provided by data link of ground positive soundings
(GPS). Finally, any marks or damage done to the forest floor during
the movement over these random routes must be removed and the floor
restored by the All Terrain Covering (ATC) organization. This is a
young, un-noisy environmental conscious group, the old heads having
left the service in 1981 for one reason or another. Their attitude is
one of service to others without concern for self.
For the moment, the system is stable as the clouds are currently
blocking the sun as required by the injunction issued late last night
resulting from an emergency meeting of the European Heads of State.
The UK Representative, Ima Leaf, is quoted as saying, "This puts our
Mad Cow Disease hoopla into the proper perspective where it belongs -
back in the barn and away from the media. Now we branch out to
something that has import." However, the tension is high and the
plants are poised. It is a very fragile cease fire we have that could
be destroyed by the smallest action on any participants part. The
plants' battle cry is, "Watch where you step. You are treading on
dangerous ground!" Their opponents say this attitude is the root of
the problem.
I'll keep you advised. Keep us in your thoughts back there
in THE REAL WORLD.
Bonne journee, et 'bientot,
Keith