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Children and Careers

Susan E Johnson sjohnso at cello.gina.calstate.edu
Fri Jan 13 02:03:29 EST 1995

Deb (dclauswa.gas.uug.arizona.edu) wrote:

: > I am 32 years old and just finishing my Ph.D.  I am married and we both would
: > like kids and I feel that the clock is beginning to tick faster and faster.
: > I am getting quite concerned over this issue because I want to have children
: > soon, especially when I consider how old I'll be when they reach their college
: > years but I also recognize that as a new Ph.D. I should be getting out there
: > and grabbing all the experience that I can.  Even if I land a job ASAP that
: > is permanent, how long should one wait to have children?  I ask this from an
: > ethical context in relation to responsibilities as an employee and also in
: > terms of what my legal rights are.  I wonder what sort of considerations
: > one must make in an academic environment?  I feel torn and also a bit resentful
: > that I could conceivably find myself 5 years down the road, still not ever
: > having children while I pursue career options.
: > 
: > I would like to hear from other women.  Having children is a choice and
: > along with these choices we make are certain repercussions, for good or
: > bad.  What choices have you made?  What insights do you have?  Have you ever
: > been descriminated against due to the possibility that you might
: > "reproduce" and "be out of commission"?
: > 
: > Thanks: I hope to hear your comments
: > 
: > Chris

: Chris, if you wait for the perfect time to have kids, you may never
: have them. There is no "perfect" time. I have several friends who
: waited too long and are very regretful of putting their careers first.
: I, likewise, wanted to wait until the perfect time. I am now very
: thankful for the little "surprise" that was born in December. When I
: found out I was pregnant, I thought it couldn't have happened at a
: worse time (new job across the country, new home, etc). Now that she's
: here, I am glad that it happened. Problems always work themselves out.
: Deb.

I agree, Deb!  In my case, I had the kids and I was wondering when the 
heck I was going to get a degree!  :)  I thought about returning for 
years, and just when I made a firm decision to, I got ANOTHER little 
surprise!  That surprise is now 8 months old, and I just finished my 
first semester back.  So, I'm 31 and 2 years away from my bachelor's and 
hopefully grad school.  The nice thing about doing school and having kids 
is that your holidays tend to follow the same schedule (or at least I'm 
certainly hoping they will...)  Nice newsgroup here, too!  :)


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